Twin Disappointments and Misunderstandings

Estrangement is built on disappointments and misunderstandings. Estrangement is complicated, and as deep-seated as the primary attachment that twins share at birth and throughout their childhoods. It is not that twins really hate their twin per se. More likely, twins

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Defining Estrangement

Estrangement is a subjective emotional experience that makes twins afraid to be together. Estrangement also causes deep shame because twins are supposed to get along. These dark feelings seem to be deep seated and often have a traumatic element to

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Boundary Issues: The Struggle of Adult Twins

The stressful and difficult developmental chore of adulthood is to cement the separation experiences and unique identities that have been established in baby steps and giant leaps throughout childhood, the teenage years, and early adulthood. In order to truly separate

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Common Issues of Adult Twins

There are common developmental milestones that twins experience as adults no matter what type of attachment they share: Separation, both emotional and physical, is more difficult than adult twins have imagined. Overcoming these painful and confusion emotional experiences takes time,

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How Can I Get Along with My Twin?

Twin relationships can be deeply conflicted and also seriously misunderstood by twins, their relatives, close friends and co-workers. Yes, twins often do not understand why they get so angry with each other. Twins do know that anger and fighting is

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Loneliness in Adult Twins

Last week my Twin Estrangement Group discussed the profound pain, depression, and emotional difficulties that loneliness brings to adult twins. Everyone in my group agreed that loneliness is an unwelcome side effect of estrangement. In my own life experiences I felt

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Why Do Twins Need Psychotherapy?

A recurring concern from twins who contact me is, “Why do I need psychotherapy?” Here are some simply stated answers and my reasoning. Separating from your twin is a very hard inner and outer journey of self discovery. Support and

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When You Hurt Your Twin You Hurt Yourself

I have come to this conclusion through my clinical experiences working with twins who have suffered differing types of estrangement, from fixable to totally unresolvable. My complicated psychological theory is based on the reality that twins share an identity as

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